Maharishi, what have you done?

I am tired of life with its pressures and expectations. I want to join an ashram. I'd like to go to India, just like Alex Chilton in that Big Star song. Of course I'd probably get there and hate it. I'd be real into it for a few weeks or maybe months, but eventually, I'd realize it wasn't what I was expecting and then I'd get frustrated or bored. Also, there would probably not be many opportunities to wash my hands. But maybe I could learn to get over that. I'd miss music too. Steely Dan does not set a good mood for transcendental meditation. I'd learn to get over that too, I guess. Maybe I'd learn to let go of my hang-ups and be at peace. Being at peace in an ashram sounds very nice. Living with a bunch of Indian religious types and Western outcasts who couldn't handle the pressure seems just the thing I've been looking for. Maybe I could even learn to get up before "the crack of noon". Being surrounded by people but at the same time being absorbed in my own quest will to transcendence seems like just the kind of 'exorcise' my demons need.

...And it appears to be a long time before the dawn.